literaryred

I haven't written one of these posts in a long time.  I'm not even sure what compelled me to make a new journal.  Maybe it's because I was friends with too many people from my past on my old one, or that my last post was August 2004 and it didn't feel right posting in the old journal because it wasn't really my journal anymore.  I mean we aren't the same people at 24 that we are at 19 or 20.  So much has changed since 2004, so I will leave the old journal to posterity and christen this one with this post. 

I don't really know where to even start.  My head has been a mess lately.  I feel like I should be happy, but I have not been feeling very happy.  It comes in waves...contentedness followed by waves of confusion, self-doubt, lack of self-esteem.  I take things out on people I shouldn't.  I need to let go of some things, embrace others, form some goals, learn to follow through, to believe in myself and my abilities, but that is not as easy as it sounds and perhaps if I actually keep up with this journal it can help me.